I sit on my bed to pray
And every morning, I thank God for life
Then I run out of reasons
Like the extent of your works
Is my reflex breathing arch
If God would speak like me to me
He would yell at me
“I spent yesterday
Saving the lives of many
I have the life plans of earth’s billions
Thought out and executed
But I still wrote your name on my palm
Just yesterday I answered your prayer
You may not have seen it but I did”
I see God losing His cool over me
Yelling at me to be less entitled and more creative
I realize God made the whole garden
But I think we should give Him His flowers
You broke me
Like the woman sitting at the mill would
Rolling her stone till her motions are fluid
Till there was nothing left of me
That could stand in your way.
When I lost all that made me
Just to stay with you
I knew there was more to me
Than the dreams that kept me up at night.
You broke me
Slowly and silently from the inside
All the things I desired to have
I let you pick out what was best for me
I decided to push my heart into your hands
To trust you with every fiber of my being
Till the threads that wove me began to look like you
I thought “If even I could not love me”
That this will be the end of me
But you broke me
Letting my barrier bones shatter
So you could reach in and resect me
From my very origin
Chukas Chinaza is a final year Pharmacy Student at Nnamdi Azikiwe University. She is a Nigerian aspiring writer and has had her work published by Roifeaneant Press. She likes to read Poetry and Christian fiction and write poetry. She is passionate about her faith as a Christian.